Hello Everyone,
I am so sorry for the amount of time I have been away. Sometimes life takes us places we don't want to be. About the middle of June I got very very sick. The last thing I wanted to do was be someones Sub. I know that some of you live this lifestyle 24/7 but we are not there yet. I am a lot better now. However just when I thought that everything was evening out and we were going to start getting back into our normal lifestyle again things took a wrong turn, big time. That is what brings me here tonight. I wanted to share this with people I know will understand how I am feeling and how incredibly hurt I am.
First of all I would have to start by telling you that Dom & I have been together for a long time. Since I was 14. So we have quite a few of the same friends and most of them we have grown up with. A very select few of these friends know what we do and have shown some interest in it. So we are more then willing to share our little world with them and give them information on the subject. We have a very close friend who has always had a very flirtatious relationship with me. Dom & I have been friends with him since we have been together and he is extremely open minded to what our lifestyle is. He was asking me about being a swinger and what our experiences had been so I said here, go read my blog and being an idiot sent him a link to it via Facebook private messages.
Now most of you know that the people that do what we do are not shy. They are pretty open to showing sexual photos and whatnot. It took me a while to put up photos of myself here because if you read back I had stated that I didn't want people to find out what Dom & I did. I got over and realized that lots of people had pictures up and that obviously they lived private lives. So came to be my Flickr account. This would come to be a huge mistake on my part. Last night I get a call from A. He tells me to check my Facebook page. So I open up my page and he then directs me to his page. I see a post on there about a paragraph long stating that he was coming out as having an affair with a married man. I kind of laughed because it was a totally ridicules statement. That was until I got a popup saying that he had tagged me in a photo. I was still on the phone with him and I asked him what photo he had tagged me in. He said I didn't that's the problem I can no longer access my own Facebook. Someone hacked him. So I clicked on the picture and what did I find, you guessed it my friends someone started posting pictures of me from my Flickr account that was tied in with this blog.
So pictures of my naked boobs, me posing provocatively are now all over our Facebook pages. As most of you with Facebook know you don't want 99% of the people you have as friends seeing any of that. So about an hour later he calls and says he is back into his account and has removed everything. OK, great thanks but the damage has been done. Now while this is going on Dom is at work and I am freaking out. We are completely open with each other so log into Doms Facebook and I find a private message that pretty much goes into detail that A and I are having an affair. I sent him a link to naked photos of myself and there was also a copy of a fabricated conversation between A and me. I spoke to Dom about it right away and deleted the message. He said he of course did not believe any of it and was sure it was someone trying to get back at A and we just happened to get put in the middle of it. The next day I wake up and check my FB and Doms and there is another message saying that she is sure that I deleted the last comment, more about our "affair" and blah blah blah. I finally write this girl (who is using a fake FB profile) and say listen, we are swingers we have been for 8 years if I do have sex with someone else it is not a big deal. Well that was pretty much a lie Dom and I only play together but it shut the bitch up real quick. She actually had the balls to say she was sorry for getting in the middle of it. Way to be sorry after you lie and try to rip apart my life for no reason. Thanks.
So now that you have gotten this long drawn out story let me state my personal feelings about all of it. I am shook to my core over all of it. I can not get over this huge feeling of being so violated. I can not get over being hurt by A because of his pretty much indifference of the whole thing. I was pretty much on my own with this huge mess to clean up. He didn't stand to lose anything over this. I stood to lose everything. I guess that is all for now. I don't know if/when I will be able to get over this. Oh and before anyone says it, yes I know it was my own fault, I put the pictures on the internet. A already pointed that out to me.
